Last night I sang in public.
I got home very late and with a blinding headache, I'll admit to downing a brandy before going on but the headache was more as a result of waves of adrenaline and relief, very harsh stage lighting in my eyes whilst seated, loud music, but mainly the most obnoxious taxi driver I have ever met. So the headache and the journey home, not so good.
However I had a great time. Its been nice to reflect on it today too as it was sort of two experiences, I'll deal with the personal one first. How was it for me?
My husband kept asking me, "why are you doing this?" and I didn't really have an answer that I could articulate. I love singing and in my kitchen in the dark wherever I have lived I have been Nat King Cole, Billie Holiday, Nina Simone, Julie London, Morrisey, Amy Winehouse, Skin from Skunk Anansie, Lloyd Cole to mention a few. In real life I've been the descant soloist in my junior school choir and a very enthusiastic but talentless karaoke performer who receives "well you gave it your all" sort of comments.
I asked my 14 year old niece who is deaf what she wanted to be when she grows up, she said "a singer but I can't sing" and I said "me too" Really I would, I love showing off but I'm not wasting Simon Cowell's time listening to me, so Ubersong was a great opportunity for me to perform, not just sing in front of drunken mates who laugh or encourage in equal measure. I always choose karaoke songs based on ones I like, but often they are miserable or not in my limited deep vocal range, or they are duets or have huge instrumentals in them. But as we had to sing backing free I could edit the instrumentals out, I could arrange the song myself. I copied most of Rosemary Clooney's version of "In the cool cool cool of the evening" and added in some original lyrics her version lacked. I learnt the lyrics and performed the story of the song. Some people, bless them even liked it.
I was less nervous than I expected so surprised when it could be heard in my voice and the line I was surest of came out in the wrong order and I had to do it again, but I was pleased that I only heard one flatish note and my powerless voice didn't sound too weak and I got the lyrics and the tune correct with a bit of gesture (and not to much, as a signer this is hard to resist) so I performed it. Most of it is a blur but I remember some encouraging and friendly faces and I think as it was such an event these are deeply scored in to my retina and will be in the good memory pile. I felt a sense of relief and that I had not blown it and some people enjoyed it and if nothing else many people were interested to know more about the song. So for the Song Archive Project, SAP there's a song to add. “ÜBERSONG is also about expectations and what happens when we don’t perform to the high standard we set ourselves.” said Yvonne. Well I met my realistic standards.
The event was also a book launch for SAP, produced by elbow room, it covers some of 8-10 year project of Yvonne's about songs and reactions to them and of singers and stagefright and performance and it has collaborations with psychologists about musical taste and overcoming nerves, so a text book really. Retails at £14.99
As an audience member I really enjoyed myself. And surprised myself doing so We had Mack the Knife from the shark's point of view sung by a woman reflected in a convex mirror, we had a school boy version of my old man's a dustman, we had Matt White doing a full on performance piece wearing a desert uniform against a projection of a lush green landscape singing Jerusalem (the WI anthem was gifted to them from the suffragette movement I read in my current issue of WI mag Living) and then cutting something out but we didn't see what because of an over zealous photographer, the stills will eventually tell all, we had a lady who hummed the god's save the queen tune and then sang all teh various songs that have used that tune and then hummed it again - brilliantly stretching our minds, girl gang who wore white and yelled about not caring about their reputation and then verbally assaulted us and then did it in sign language and then smashed a guitar up, madly I started thinking oooh how juvenile but by the end it felt like a feminist anthem and many more brilliant, hilarious, moving and interesting performances.
If it happens again I may not "SING" but I totally reccommend viewing,
oh and then we all sang Ivor Cutler songs, well not all of us but it was a good old singalong. I spent some goood times with a group of friends as a teenager listening to Ivor on green vinyl at my mate David's house, happy memories. You don't get songs like that and you sure as hell don't get green vinyl outside of Homebase these days.
Also there were people there I'd met before who had forgotten me, I somehow think I may stick in the mind a bit more now.
But that's a good thing, right?
Jen
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